Pole Mate [pohl-meyt] (noun): A person who loves pole dancing as much as you do and who is always in class to encourage you, laugh with you, remind you to point your toes, take photos of your progress, and photo bomb all of your shots with booty shaking and crazy dancing!
It has always amazed me how quickly people bonded in pole class. Unlike making friends in other contexts, the factors that bring together two people as they swing around upside-down can lead to a magical friendship. And when a non-pole-friend becomes a pole mate too, this is something extra special!
One of the most talked about reasons for encouraging people to take up pole is the sense of community that grows from studios and pole classes. For women and men, these friendships boost self confidence, increase motivation, teach people how to share and celebrate success, and make exercising fun!
Dancing with Julie! Photo Credit: Steve Teng
Below are six more reasons why pole mates are the best mates (not forgetting hoop pals, silks friends, and all the other aerial buddies out there too!)
Accountability
Let’s be honest, life can be busy. Between work, family, children, eating right, cleaning the house, and watching the latest series on Netflix, it can be hard to find time to workout. Most likely pole dance classes are easier to show up to than just working out at the gym, but even then, after a long day it can be tempting to just curl up on the couch and chill. Good pole mates keep you accountable. You don’t want to let each other down, and you both know you’re going to have a great time together in class.
Spotting and sharing new tricks or flow
Ideally you want a trained professional to spot you for tricks and teach you the safest and most effective way into and out of pole moves. But during practice times or when training at home, a pole mate is an essential resource in helping you work up to being able to accomplish a trick on your own. If they have already accomplished the trick, they may also share their own knowledge, which may be just the feedback you need to nail your nemesis move! Don’t be competitive and hide all your secrets either. Pole mate relationships are reciprocal and information flows both ways.
Ksenia spotting me as I work out this silk lock
Increase in motivation
By far the biggest advantage of having pole mates is the increase in motivation, and not just to show up to class. Set goals together and support each other in working towards them. Yes this involves a little bit of peer pressure, but sometimes that’s just the push you, or a friend may need, to really be their best.
Celebrating successes
In line with the noncompetitive ideas mentioned above, having supportive pole mates allows you share in each other’s success. These might be pole goals you have worked on for months, or simply learning a routine together and performing at a showcase. No matter how small, reward yourself and add depth to your relationship – a day at the beach, burgers and ice-cream, tickets to a pole show, or a massage!
Objective Perspective
Sometimes you need a friend to just tell you how it is. I love the energy of a supportive pole class, but a real pole mate will equally bring you up and be honest when things are not going so well. It can invaluable to have constructive criticism to polish a routine or choose a costume that fits just so.
Share cross training equipment or even private classes
Having pole mates can even save you money! Can’t afford a private class? make it a semi-private and plan with your friend what tricks and transitions you will work on with the instructor together. Don’t want to buy exercise gear that you are afraid you won’t use? Share the cost with your pole mate and train together – thera bands, yoga mats and blocks, and ankle weights, are all portable and can be shared around if you are training at home or in the studio. As you practice with the materials you will also be able to show your friends new exercises further supporting your cross training goals!
“Strong people don’t put others down … they lift them up!” Photo Credit: Steve Teng
Always remember that your pole mate is also your friend. Know each other’s limits and know when to call it a day. Having motivation is awesome, but over training is no fun for anyone.
On a final note, if you and your pole mates are up to a similar level in your training, try out some acro or doubles pole moves! There are lots of inspiring posts on Instagram and Facebook and doubles tricks are a great way to support your proprioception, coordination, strength, and balance. Already having a strong sense of trust in your partner makes many of these tricks so much safer and easier too.